Every so often an article appears in the mainstream media about women’s breast shapes, and the fixation that goes with them. Talking about women’s body parts is an industry in itself.

Lately, however, more attention has been focused on the shape of men’s bits too. No, not THAT bit. Other bits.

A few years ago ‘metro-sexual’ entered our lexicon to stay. A metrosexual is a male who bothers enough about his appearance to use moisturizer, to shave or wax parts of his body other than his face, and to generally make himself nicer to be near. It’s what women have been doing for centuries, only men have discovered it and ‘lo’, the re-invention of the wheel.

‘Metrosexuality’ is what others may call ‘clean’ or ‘well groomed’ or ‘human’, but it was so liberating for males that it led to more stereotyping titles regarding appearance such as Hipster and Lumbersexual, both of which are considered ‘hetero-masculine’ versions of homosexual subcultures. If the language and the concepts make your eyes glaze and your brain long for the good old days when a bloke was a guy who looked like a bloke and no one was asked to ‘check their white privilege’, here is some exciting news. A new word, ‘Spornosexual’ has arrived, and it, too, is here to stay.

Spornosexuals are men who are buff, but not TOO buff, and who look like studly porn stars when they get their kit off. The term spornosexual means literally that. Sporting porn star.

Think Daniel Craig, David Beckham or Hugh Jackman as he’s gotten older.

A spornosexual male is looking to fill his testosterone filled male shape out to all its edges. He wants true torso triangulation. He wants arms that look like they lift, but he doesn’t want them to look like they’ll burst. He wants abs that say ‘all night long’ , but he wants a neck that looks good in a tie. Spornosexual males use a good quality hair conditioner, and never forget leg day. They have no problem working out to Adele, and tattoo ‘go hard or go home’ on their waxed chests.

Of course, if you want to look like a porn star, you may also want porn star proportions in other parts of your anatomy, but as yet there are no exercises at the gym that will allow for that kind of build.

No doubt the bro’s are working on that little problem even as we speak.

Creams made from Rhino horn do not work….Rhinos are all but extinct, why would anyone think their penises are good at sex? But someone somewhere has a solution at hand. So to speak.

To be a spornosexual you don’t have to be young, in fact some of the most famous hotties in this community of men are well into their 40’s and 50’s. They may previously have chosen to bulk up big to look like body builders, or they may have come in from the ‘thin and interesting’ field, but now they are keen to look like ‘kind-of-ordinary men’, with the chiseled physique of Thor. Coal miners who also happen to own a pastel button up shirt. Rugged guys with soft hands.

Such is the draw of this new found stylized masculinity that men of every age group are flocking to join up to Spornosexual workouts, websites, and support groups.

The Spornosexual is a modern man full of complexity and complexes, he wants to be a ‘real man’, but he doesn’t want to be out of touch with his feminine side. And even if he hasn’t got it all worked out yet, he still gets his work out in.



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